First Annual NVC Trainers' Retreat

First international NVC trainers’ Retreat

This is a personal report on my experience and that of 14 other trainers at the Gathering of July 21-26 2009.

SUMMARY

It was fantastic, everyone “should” go!   ;)

The aims stated for the retreat was “…to get together, grow as people, and then as trainers, inspire each other with our creativity, help each other with our current growing edges & in embodying more & more what we are so passionately sharing with others”. According to the reporting by most people who attended, this goal was largely realised.

LONG VERSION

It seems to me that the most important aspect of this gathering was an opportunity to be among peers. What does that mean, you ask? It means, among other things, being in a mutually nourishing setup; being with other experienced trainers who’ve evolved in their craft, their reflection, their own beings, who’ve taught vast enough numbers of participants so as to have a wealth of anecdotes to draw, learn and share from; being with people who’ve incorporated NVC consciousness into their beings and so are able and willing to take responsibility for their experience on an ongoing basis; being with this shared level of personal responsibility also allows each one of us to relax (ie not “have to hold the space for others”) and enjoy an even fuller moment-to-moment self connection; being with this shared level of personal responsibility has also allowed us to push our habitual comfort zones of authenticity, wanting to share the dare of more honesty then most of us tend to move towards in our daily lives. It has truly been a nourishing delight.

As far as nourishment goes, I also want to mention the setting we were in, without going into extraneous details. We were in remote country and so in a quiet place. The building we used is new, modern, clean and comfy. The food we were served was vegan/vegetarian, rich, varied, tasty and fulfilling. I have even heard devoted meat eaters express their amazement at the fact that they were not missing meat at all, even after 5 days! We were all in agreement that picking the same place again for next year’s retreat was a great idea.

The other form of nourishment I wish to share with you is the richness and variety of sessions we held and offered one another. Even though we didn’t have an established structure for decision-making around how to use our time together, we managed to share and rotate leadership in organising one day, and then the next (Jerry, JP, Jeff…). Much learning was drawn from that aspect alone. Then, we brainstormed about what we’d like to get from others and what we felt moved to share. We also committed to continuously go with what was alive, to ask for and to share. We experienced much connection through this alone, plus Norman offered to lead Empathy Circles (in which we speak to the Circle and from a place of being moved to speak only), which allowed us to share very vulnerably and deeply together. It gave us a setting and an inkling to keep on going further together, it fostered a real sense of community, of being-with, of caring-for, of sacred holding together.

Here’s a brief list of what was offered and shared (which doesn’t take into account the focussed meal discussions hosted by many of us).

- Dear Marshall gratitude project – Valerie
- Empathy Circles - Norman and Gina
- Abundance and NVC work - Jeff
- Developing grassroots NVC organisations - Jeff
- History of CNVC - Rita
- CNVC what next – what would we like? - all
- Coaching with NVC - Martha
- Radical authenticity - one by Jeff and one by Martha
- Let’s talk about sex - Valerie
- Needs list discussion - Rita
- Gratitude Circle - Dian
- Delightful practices - Bob
- Sociocracy - Jerry

I am not sharing many details about every session because I mostly want to convey an idea of some of the topics that we shared, and the overall spirit we shared them in.

In fact, in the sociocracy session, we used its process in order to clarify and agree on the aim for next year’s retreat and this is what we came to agree upon:

Aim of the 2010 Trainers Retreat (decided by those in attendance at the 2009 retreat):

For NVC providers* to live the consciousness of NVC in an annual residential retreat, with activities that support the following:

. Connection
. Sharing technical NVC skills (such as "delightful practices")
. Business and organizational purposes
. Mutual support and healing

*By NVC providers we mean CNVC certified trainers, CNVC certification candidates, and NVC providers who are neither. For NVC providers who are neither certified nor candidates who would like to participate in the retreat, we ask that they be at the skill level of certified trainers and provide 2 letters of recommendation from CNVC certified trainers. A committee of two will review and decide about these applications. The Committee consists of Gina Cenciose and Rita Herzog. Should either decide that they are not able or willing to serve, they will select a replacement by joint decision.

If you’d like to see some photos of the event (thanks JP!!), please visit this YouTube address:

It is with much pleasure and gratitude that I share my experience at this retreat. I came out of it full, belonging like never before to a vibrant and expansive NVC community!

Valérie Lanctôt-Bédard